The Jonas Brothers - Lines, Vines and Trying Times

The Jonas Brothers Fall Flat with Lines, Vines and Trying Times

The Jonas Brothers

Who is the Audience for Lines, Vines and Trying Times?

Do 11-year-olds really listen to Celine Dion ballads or dig mid-'80s Tom Jones arrangements? And are those preteens already bitter about relationships, to the point where paranoia and one-sided blame games come into play?

Those questions have to be asked because the "musical growth" that The Jonas Brothers talked about in interviews before the release of Lines seems to be geared towards overly-fussy production and cliche-filled lyrics, and describing boyfriend/girlfriend situations that have gone horribly wrong.

There seem to be three themes running through Lines, Vines and Trying Times: someone feels like being vindictive against a former girlfriend; the producer, John Fields, really likes 1980s pop; and every other tune screams "Hey, look! We're using horns on this song!"

Sound-alike songs abound: "Much Better" mirrors General Public's "Tenderness", "Hey Baby" features a classic Paula Abdul bop groove, and "Don't Speak" sounds so much like Simple Minds it could have been on the Breakfast Club Soundtrack.

And, as Disney are wont to do, a cross-promotional opportunity is utilized: Miley Cyrus shows up for a semi-twangy duet on "Before the Storm," a tune straight out of the Desmond Child/Diane Warren book of bombastic rock ballad songwriting.

More Music from Lines, Vines and Trying Times

Lines, Vines and Trying Times unfortunately includes several experiments gone bad: the nouveau faux country of "What Did I Do to Your Heart" comes complete with obligatory sawing fiddles and "wonka wonka wow wow" harmonica runs; the absolutely ridiculous gangsta rap duet with Common is so bad you expect it to be an Andy Samberg SNL satire; and the band really misstep on the Warrant-like metal rocker "Poison Ivy," a tune that declares that "everybody hates that bitch." Generally, I'm no prude when it comes to lyrical content, but when an album is marketed directly to preteens and the band have a self-perpetuated reputation of genteelness, it's kind of a cheap shot to use hateful language toward women.

The best songs by far come from outside projects: "Fly with Me" was played over the end credits of Night at the Museum 2, and "Keep it Real" was featured on the fourth episode of their JONAS show on the Disney Channel, "Keeping it Real." It seems, then, that while The Jonas Brothers try to prove their maturity with their full CD releases, their kid and tween music will be featured on movie soundtracks and TV shows like the Disney Channel's JONAS.

The Verdict

Unfortunately, Lines, Vines and Trying Times is a blah album without a solid audience: too Adult Contemporary to appeal to younger fans, and too slight to catch the ear of older listeners. This one is for hardcore fans and completists only.

Released June 16, 2009; Hollywood Records

Track Listing

1. "World War III"
2. "Paranoid"
3. "Fly with Me"
4. "Poison Ivy"
5. "Hey Baby"
6. "Before the Storm" featuring Miley Cyrus
7. "What Did I Do to Your Heart"
8. "Much Better"
9. "Black Keys"
10. "Don't Charge Me for the Crime" featuring Common
11. "Turn Right"
12. "Don't Speak"
13. "Keep it Real"